


somewhere on the atlantic

by stonedlennon



Series: how we won the war [5]
Category: The Beatles
Genre: 1930s, 1939, Alternate Universe - World War II, M/M, The Battle of the Atlantic, The Royal Navy, War Correspondence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-12
Updated: 2017-02-12
Packaged: 2018-09-22 16:39:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9616319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stonedlennon/pseuds/stonedlennon
Summary: Paul writes to John on his first convoy deployment. Undated, late 1939.





	

**Author's Note:**

> this has been lurking in my drafts for a while.. consider this slightly filler given the segment that's up next. i'll also reiterate that i plan to work on this series when i have muse, so settle in for the long haul! and please be patient with me, i am small.
> 
> also: as always, i seriously suggest listening to ["england" by the national](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zI9ivyULEW4) for just.. this whole series.

`Dear John,`

`No I’ve not forgot to write! Sounds mad (I know) but war is much busier than you, me, or anyone has been lead to believe. Can’t say much obviously for censor reasons (how are you lads alright?) so I hope you won’t be annoyed at the lack of details. I can say some things provided they won’t threaten King & Country but it’s no great cipher so don’t get too excited.`

`Really most of the time is spent checking charts. Maps and charts and all that to make sure we’re on course. The lads thought it dead funny first time they saw me in uniform but they sobered up quick! Reckon they half thought I’d give them one. I put it on for a bit (they made it too easy really) but since they’ve twigged they’ve not let me live it down. Hard to keep order when your subordinates are also your mates. Ah well but we try.`

`I’ll pre-empt whatever you’re going to ask – NO I have not thrown anyone in the brig!! You only get chucked in there if you’ve stolen something or I don’t know you want to throw yourself overboard. Despite being at sea now for ████ days really not much has changed. I’ve not even seen a German sub yet (shock horror!) though some of the other lads say it’s only a matter of time. Is it terrible of me to say I’m quite excited? Well excited is the wrong word but I did join the navy for a reason. I told you something once in a café – can you remember? Funny how I wasn’t at war then and now I am and if anything I feel what I felt a hundred times over. Nervous, excited, et al.`

`Speaking of I’m sorry I couldn’t get a photo of me uniform before I left. You know how things are. Thank you for seeing me off, that day on the dock.  It meant a lot that you were there. You looked really good – even if I nearly lost you in the mess!! Daft bugger. Lucky you didn’t fall off into the water.`

`If it’s O.K. I’ll write whenever I can. They do a mail run ████ ██ ████ so you’ll probably get a whole heap at once! If I’ve got your address wrong – sorry to whoever is reading this! Please send it on to J.W.Lennon. He’s an annoying bastard, you can’t miss him.`

`Hope you’re safe and happy. Or try to be anyway. Don’t miss me too much!`

`See you soon`

`Paul`  


* * *

  
`Johnny,`

`Something quite funny happened to day. My superior officer a chap called ██████████ tasked me with training some of the ordinary seamen with their duties. Most of these you learn at the U.N.D if you were lucky to get in but a lot of these fellas just passed basic N.T. (naval training) and have been thrown in the deep end (so to speak). Anyway in between teaching the lads general things (guns, signalling, etc) my superior takes me to one side and asked me what I’m doing. “Teaching the lads sir as you asked” I said. “No no no – teach them to be sailors” Now I’m standing there thinking bloody hell we’ve only been at sea five minutes and we’ve already lost one. I said I didn’t know what he meant. WELL turns out the H.M.S. brass have an idea about ████████ ████████ to ████████ which doesn’t sound as strange as you might think – quite clever. So I told the lads this and one of them, a kid from up north who must be seventeen if ever a day, said “but ser if I wanted to pretend to be a sailor idve stayed at home” “where’s that then” I said – “Glasgow”`

`O.K. might have been funnier at the time.`

`Anyway the main point is that after a while you forget to be afraid. It’s sort of instinct you know, to push it away and think right I’m here on a job. It feels like a job how – funny eh? When I start my shift it’s like going to work and when I’m off going to play cards with the lads it’s like going to the pub. Course I’d do a whole lot more than play cards if that meant I could have a drink, but that’s the way it goes at sea I suppose.  `

`This past day or so I’ve been that dead busy but in between I keep thinking about you. Sorry if it’s ‘funny’ to say as much but what I mean is that I’m quite annoyed I met you when I did. Especially as we lived a walk away from each other (!) this whole time. I mean when you were in Woolton, not your place in the city. Speaking of, how’s your auntie Mimi? Hope she’s not on at you to break your HONOUR and make you SERVE YOUR COUNTRY. I’m joking, obviously. How did your tribunal go? Good news? Let me know.`

`Ta ta`

`Paul`  


* * *

  
`John,`

`Word is we lost two of our own today – the H.M.S. ████ ██████ and the H.M.S. ████████████. They were destroyed by torpedoes. None of the lads know how to react. I feel quite shocked to be really honest with you. We knew this would come but not like this and so soon. We get reports on Churchill’s speeches over the wireless. Someone ought to tell him to tone it down!! If he keeps inciting the Germans we won’t make it to our destination, let alone home. I don’t mean to alarm you (if you are alarmed) but it’s the plain truth.`

`Oh dear I’m making it sound quite dire out here. It’s not too bad. We were all down in the dumps for a while until one of the lads rallied and we put on an impromptu show instead. Impromptu means spur of the moment, in case you were wondering. The lads hound and hound me until I sing em a tune or two . . . not that I mind! If we could listen to music more often I don’t think I’d feel quite so bored. It can get dead lonely down here, even when you’re surrounded by all your mates. Everyone drifts off and thinks about home. There are a number of boys in my bunk that can’t be over twenty if ever a day. I think about when I was their age and I think cor no wonder they’re all missing their mums. I would be too if she were still alive.`

`To date I’ve gone one (1) letter from my Dad. I reckon he thinks if he writes too much he’ll distract me. Thanks Dad (!)`

`Let me know how you are. If you get any more news about the fatalities let us know would you? It’s like being in the dark sometimes out here.`

`Bye for now`

`Paul  
`

* * *

  
`Dear John,`

`Afraid this won’t be the longest letter in the world. We were hit today – quite badly. I’m O.K. Most of the crew are. Aside from some casualties everyone is mainly hopping mad! When they’re not pretending they’re not dead afraid of course. Can’t go into details because well you know, but please don’t be worried (if you were going to be worried – if not carry on). I’m really fine. A bit knocked about but that’s all.`

`To be honest it all came as a bit of a shock especially after the last round. No one thinks they’re the ones who’ll be hit!! By all accounts we were in what we call a ‘clear zone’ (no subs or enemy activity). There has been some word that the Germans have developed new tech that lets them hide from our ███████ It’s not my job to figure out when, why, and so on, but everyone is bothering the sergeant for any bit of news. He’s not happy about it – but what are we supposed to do? I’d rather know what was going on for my men’s sake than sit on me hands. I feel very protective over them. Suppose unless you’re in the navy or army you wouldn’t get it – I hope you understand what I mean.`

`It’s funny. You’re sort of my window to a normal world, the one outside the war I mean. What is it like at home? Has anything changed? Please tell me any bit of news you can. We don’t get newspapers (for obvious reasons) and if we use the radios we have to be tricky about it.`

`If you get a chance, by the way, could you send me some of those American cigs you smoke?`

`Not much else to say really. After today I’ve thought about you a lot. Mainly what would happen if we had been hit more terribly. I’ll save up what I want to say for when I come home (soon hopefully!)`

`Yours`

`Paul`  


* * *

`   
John,`

`There is a saying at sea – if you can’t sleep, write! We have journals that we’re given to keep us occupied. A lot of the lads do little drawings or write poetry like in the old war. I’ve tried doing some drawing and I think it looks alright. Maybe I’ll send you some – provided you don’t laugh at them! At school I used to do painting and that. I think I was quite good. Not good enough to become an illustrator or anything, but I liked it. Some of the lads want to start up a ship wide newsletter. They asked me to get involved but I already play and sing in the ship band – bet you’d have guessed that! You said once you liked it when I played. You might not like it now. Most of the time we play marching music (for morale) but I’ve sneaked in some dance songs to keep everyone’s spirits up.`

`There is a song that the lads always request. "We'll Meet Again." I'm sure you know it. That's one of my favourites to sing - can you guess why?`

`Along with wanting proper music, we want some ‘company’. It’s late enough so I can write this next bit without feeling stupid. Do you remember when we went to ‘the hideaway’? Or when we stood and talked at B’s party? I look at the photos we took together whenever I can. The lads have photos of their sweethearts too. Some of the girls look too nice for them – hey I can say that because they’re under my charge! I feel proud that you’re real. ~~And that you’re mine (?)~~`

`I think about you a lot – but you should know that by now. War does funny things to you. Some things you thought were important don’t seem so big after a while.`

`I’m feeling tired now so I should go before I sleep on you (not a bad thing)`

`Goodnight for now`

`Paul`  


* * *

  
` Johnny,`

`Today was quite something! I don’t know how much you know about how the navy works (not much probably – ha ha!) but on a convoy we have some aeroplanes.`

`There are only about ██ because the R.A.F. can take off from ████████ and it’s much easier than way. But because of how big our convoy is, we have enough to help out if things get bad. The pilots are really great guys. Very funny with that famous Liverpudlian wit – one of them reminds me of you! He is, however, better tempered.`

`We passed a ‘line’ that means we can breathe easy, at least until we turn back around! A transmission on the radio came through around ██████ which meant we had about ███ clear. A lot can happen in that span of time! The pilots went to their planes and we all rushed out on deck. Wow! They were so beautiful in the sky. Not a cloud to be out. It was cold and still. They came over the water with a sound like a faraway train, but much deeper, like they were flying in a cave. You see planes in pictures but you never realize just how big they really are! I’ve only seen them fly twice before, but this felt different. I think everyone else felt it too. We all held our breath until it was over. I don’t want to forget that.`

`Thank you for the cigarettes. When I smoke one I picture what you look like. Hope you’ve been wearing your specs – I never told you just how good you look with them on.`

`I’m missing you more than I can say (literally)`

`See you soon`

`Paul`  


* * *

  
`Johnny,`

`Brr, it’s bloody cold on the Atlantic!! Some of the boys think we must be going up near ████ ████████ because why else would it be so ruddy freezing? When I go up for first watch it’s really like turning into a human icicle. Even our icebox at home doesn’t get as cold as this – no, LIVERPOOL doesn’t get as cold as this! You’ve never known such cold until you’ve stood outside at 4 A.M. with your knees knocking the wind howling and the sea thrashing (how’s that for imagery!)`

`I think we might be headed back soon. Hard to say because of course I can’t tell you what we’ve been up to but it seems like we’ll need to stop SOMEWHERE. Can’t go running on empty fumes forever. I’ll admit something to you alright – I have a persistent fantasy about pulling into harbour somewhere really warm, with nice drinks, and maybe SOMEONE on me knee. Only then will I know true peace. At least until I thaw out.`

`Speaking of how’s it back home? Got yourself any ‘company’ of your own? You better not have or there’ll be trouble.`

`Sorry this is a short one today. A couple of the signallers are in the sick bay so it’s up to us to pick up the slack – which means more time outside! I can hardly wait.`

`Ta ta love`

`Paul`

`P.S. I miss you. Watch for my ship on the horizon.`

**Author's Note:**

> @stonedlennon on tumblr


End file.
